Discovering the Path Within Through IFS: The Role of Self in Healing Trauma
Feeling overwhelmed by trauma symptoms? Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy can support you by helping you connect with your Self-energy, the calm and compassionate core within all of us. IFS encourages us to engage with our internal parts—those unique facets of our personality that protect us from past and present pain. By connecting with our Self-energy and fostering a dialogue with these parts, we can offer a healing presence to our wounded parts. We do this by nurturing our Self-energy.
Understanding the Internal Family System & The Power of Self
IFS therapy teaches that our mind houses various sub-personalities or “parts,” and each of us also has a core Self surrounded by these parts. You might consider parts similar to defence mechanisms in that they engage in actions to protect us from a perceived threat. But, sometimes these parts get stuck in extreme defensive roles that impact our lives negatively. For example, many of us have a part who wants us to get everything right and not make mistakes, and uses self-criticism to ‘keep us in line.’ While the intention of this part is good, the impact of the part’s intolerance for mistakes can generate anxiety and shame. Connecting with our Self-energy can help cope with and work through the anxiety and shame. Self-energy acts as the guiding light, helping us achieve balance and heal trauma or attachment wounds gently without being overwhelmed.
How is IFS Different than Other Forms of Therapy?
Instead of treating symptoms alone, IFS targets the root of distress – accessing the sticky stuff that often doesn’t shift despite years of therapy, insight gained, and positive affirmations. By accessing Self-energy, you can engage with wounded parts with kindness, calmness, and curiosity, leading to more grounded and deeper healing.
It can feel overwhelming to witness our deepest wounds and painful histories, causing emotional dysregulation if we don’t have resources and strategies to cope with what is held within our subconscious mind. Accessing our Self-energy as we witness what our parts hold can be that resource, allowing for calmness and compassion as we face our pain. This process facilitates an unburdening and transformation of wounded and protective parts. Embracing Self-energy often leads to emotional balance and a sense of internal peace and strength.
More About Self
In IFS, we refer to the eight C’s of Self-energy; these are qualities, or states, that your inner Self naturally embodies. They include, compassion, calmness, confidence, courage, creativity, curiosity, connection, and clarity. To put it simply, when you are feeling mostly anything other than these eight ‘C’ qualities or states, IFS understands this as being ‘blended’ with a part who is blocking your access to your Self-energy. Accessing your Self-energy involves unblending from the part. The image that makes this clearest for me is the idea of a solar eclipse – when the moon comes between the Earth and sun, blocking the sun from being seen and felt. The sun is still there, just not as accessible to us in that moment. Similarly, parts block Self from being accessible to us. It is important to clarify that unblending is not about “getting rid of” the part, but making some internal space for Self and part to separate and then to connect.
Access Your Healing Self-Energy
To begin your self-exploration journey, the first step is quieting your mind and connecting with your Self-energy. Let’s explore how to do this in more detail.
Steps to Access Self in IFS
1. Create a Quiet Environment
Find a peaceful space where you won’t be disturbed, allowing for introspection and focus.
2. Practice Mindfulness
Engage in mindfulness exercises to centre yourself. Meditation or deep breathing can help quiet external distractions.
3. Set an Intention
Clearly state your intention to connect with your Self-energy and bring curiosity to your internal system of parts. This intention sets the tone for your session.
4. Follow the Problem to the Part
Choose an area in your life where you seem to experience difficulty. Think of the problem, situation or person and notice any sensations in or around your body, any thoughts, emotions, or images that arise as you focus on that problem.
5. Focus on Sensations, Emotions & Thoughts
Pay attention to any thoughts, feelings, or physical sensations. These internal experiences are indicators of how that part exists within your mind and body.
6. Practice Unblending
Work on distinguishing between your core Self and the parts. Ask yourself “How do I feel toward that part of me?” This is an important question as it will help you clarify whether you have access to your Self-energy as you observe the part. This step may involve acknowledging your emotions without being overwhelmed by them, and gently asking that the part allow just a little space for Self to be here as well by taking a step back. This will allow Self to listen better to what the part would like to communicate.
7. Identify and Engage with Parts
Clearly identify the different parts that arise. Approach them with curiosity and openness, acknowledging their presence, feelings, and roles. For example, if you notice the emotion of frustration and the sensation of tension in your body, this probably indicates the presence of a part who feels frustration about something. Try being open and curious about this frustration, observing it from a slight distance – similar to how we observe our thoughts during mindfulness meditation practice.
8. Cultivate Compassion and Curiosity
As you engage with each part, do so with kindness and a genuine desire to understand their perspectives and intentions. Acknowledge the emotional experience of the part and thank the part for it’s protection (remember that the intention of the part is to protect – even if this is not how it always plays out for you).
9. Journal Your Insights
Write down observations and reflections on your experiences. Journaling can clarify thoughts and reinforce learning.
10. Seek Professional Guidance if Needed
Be gentle with yourself as this process takes practice and has many nuances. Don’t hesitate to seek support from a trained IFS therapist who can guide you in deepening your connection with Self-energy, getting to know your parts, and working through your trauma.
Tips for Practice
IFS therapy offers techniques like visualization and journaling to enhance your connection with Self-energy and parts. Visualization creates a safe mental space for revisiting traumatic memories and allows for a visual connection between Self and part, while journaling and mindfulness can further strengthen this connection. Try this free guided meditation to support you in accessing Self and unblending from your parts.
Embracing Supportive Resources
Healing is attainable when rooted in Self-energy. Each small step forward counts as progress. Support through therapy, groups, or friends, along with resources focused on IFS, can deepen your journey. Learning to access and trust in your Self-energy can guide you through your trauma and enhance your resilience. Don’t hesitate to seek professional help with this process. Our clinicians are trained in IFS and are here to support you in accessing your core Self.
Written by Katie Hilchey, R. Psych.